It originally aired on the Fox network in the United States on January 14, 1990. Do I smell cupcakes? Marge: These are for Lisa’s class. Many of us are bitter, resentful individuals. [Nelson punches Bart and the dream ends. That little doozy's been a Simpsons trademark for generations. Marge: Mmmhmm. I guess all that's left is a hearty handshake. Everything, above aboard here. Oh, but, Bart, don't you remember the boredom... the ennui, the intellectual malaise? Homer: Yeah, And I got the day off from work. Yeah, this is one episode I simply cannot defend. It is also the most viewed episode in Simpsons history, with over 33 million households watching the premiere. Marge: Oh, Homer that's ridiculous! Script error: No such module "Footnotes". That way, everything you do will be nice and legal. You've helped me out with things... and we're closer than we've ever been. Uh-- A big, dumb, balding, North American ape with no chin. Herman: You'll need more. He looks so lifelike. Lisa: Bart, here's that cupcake you wanted. - Bart! Mr. Skinner, Dr. Pyor is here to see you. (adsbygoogle = window.adsbygoogle || []).push({}); Well, it seems the smartest child in the class... is also the quietest. Bleech! Marge: Bart, I feel so bad for going so many years without... mmm, hmm-- What's that word where you encourage something to grow? Bart: Huh! Lunchtime, Bart. Bart: It bounces off us, and sticks to you. Milhouse: Thanks Bart, we got the day off from school for this. Bart: Yeah, he's pretty chunkified all right. Don't mind ifl do. Work, brains, and [holds up a cupcake] Hmm.. Bart: Hey! Here. BART On guard! Olajuwan! [throws mud in Nelson's eye and punches him gently]. Visualize it, Bart. Wish there was something nice to say about it, but… I can’t find anything. Marge: That's better Homer, be brave. I see boy. Bart, there are students in this class with a chance to do well. Why should I suffer? Right guys? Rocky Taylor. Army: Because I cheated on the test. 'Bart the General' has Bart imagining his own funeral. It starts at 8:00. Grampa: [screams] Bart, what brings you here? All right! Marge: [Marge grabs hold of Bart's shirt.] Herman: Don't you worry. It would violate the code of the schoolyard. As far as “Nice things Bart did to Lisa”, there was also him buying the Bleeding Gums Murphy record in “Round Springfield”, also him standing up for her after one of Nelson’s thugs ruins her box of brownies all thway back in “Bart the General”. There's your bell! Army: One! Bart: Wow. Homer: Lisa, maybe you should try some of this. Homer: Well, thank you very much Mrs. Maharishi Gandhi. I'm Ms. Melon, your learning coordinator. - Yum! This aptitude test we administered this morning... has revealed that the young Bart here is what we call a "gifted child.". We estimate the damage at $75, and frankly... we think it's terribly unfair that other taxpayers should foot the bill. [w:c:simpsons:Herman Hermann: What's the password? -- ``Bart the General'' Simulated hand-to-hand. Takes like 5 minutes. Herman! Principal Skinner: I think we should retest him. Well, it's really pretty top secret, ma'am. Bart: Here we go. There's your enemy! Homer: Unfortunately, son, we Simpsons, sometimes have to bend the rules a little in order to hold our own. I know you can't eat it now, so I'll just place it lovingly on your forehead. In the trashcan with it. Ms. Melon: Don't you get it, Bart? The school nurse did wonderful job reconstructing his little face after the fight. TABLE OF CONTENTS (Teacher Edition): Script 1; Christmas In The West Piano/Vocal Score; Christmas In The West Lyric Sheet; Script 2; Bart's Theme Piano/Vocal Score; Script 3 O'Hara! Remember to visualize the complex problems, and relax. Show up around nine-ish. Boys, let's see your hands. Homer: So, you had a little scuffle, eh? Mrs. Krabappel, isn't Bart supposed to face the window... so he won't be tempted to look at his neighbor's paper? It can't fail against a 10-year old! Not seeing why it's gotten so much attention here. Now you know it. You know... you misspelled "confession.". Bart: Intelligence indicates he shakes down kids for quarters at the arcade, then heads to the Kwik-E-Mart for a cherry squishee. He-he. Mr. and Mrs. Simpson, this is our district psychiatrist, Dr. J.Loren Pryor. I'm finished. Chang! I can't promise you victory. I'll just change “Otto von Bismarck” to read “Bart Simpson”. I think it's under the short leg of the couch. They're for "Bart The Genius", "Bart The General" and "Moaning Lisa." Grampa: Sorry, Bart. Or don't. In addition to the six commentaries heard on DVD One, we also find scripts for a few episodes. He can't mean that. I had a little accident in chemistry today. (pans to door) The following is a list of words I never want to hear on television again: Number 1: Bra, Number 2: Horny, Number 3: Family jewels. With it's homages to several war films (Full Metal Jacket, The Longest Day, Stripes and especially Patton.) It's getting kinda dark. There's nothing wrong with a father kissing his son. Record Collecting 2020 Or why I need to stop. I was merely tying to fend off the desecration of the school building. Coward: It's my nerves, sir. We've got a stowaway, sir. [Bart throws loads of knives at Nelson, which are plastic and Nelson drags them off.] Without law and order, man has no freedom. (``Perish the thought!'') Mr. and Mrs. Simpson, congratulations once again. [opens the oven] Oooh, do I ever! Herman: Strategy. Bart: Let's just say I payed the inevitable price for helping out my sister. Just watched "Bart the General." Commence saturation bombing! These are very interesting to see how they were originally written and how it went to final show. Ah. Finally, this disc also has three Scripts to browse through. Outside, the clock shows “3:15”. Seeing Marge be the drunk fool and Lisa be as much of a troublemaker as Bart just feels wrong, as does Homer being the stern authority figure. Bart: Psst. Keep it down! Hassle in the Castle (Scooby-Doo, Where Are You! There are no good wars, with the following exceptions: The American Revolution, World War II, and the Star Wars trilogy. Nelson: Hey, wait a minute. Now hit him! If you'd like to learn more about war, there's lots of books in your local library, many of them with cool, gory pictures. He's frequently absent from school, then gives teachers pathetic excuse notes... that are obviously childish forgeries when compared to--, Well, at any rate, it is my reluctant decision--. Somebody else's blood splatters on me. OK, I can use this one from the Franco-Prussian War. Article six: Although Nelson shall have no official power he shall remain a figurehead of menace in the neighborhood. Marge: What on earth are you talking about Homer?! Lisa: He'll give you good advice, he's the toughest Simpson alive. I thought you could help him with some kind of strategy. Homer: And there's nothing wrong with hitting someone when its back is turned. Take your favorite fandoms with you and never miss a beat. Bart: I can't hear you! Marge: So tomorrow, instead of bickering with this boy, talk to him. I'll trade you 1,000 picoliters of my milk for 4 gills of yours. Sort of a spare in case Bart's brain blows up. Excellent. We are not all vibrant fun loving sex maniacs. It sounds good to me. Homer: Wait a minute, you little cheater. Bart! One, two, three, four. So, what was it you wanted to tell me, son? Bart: Oh, we all know why we're here, right? Bart: [stuttering] Did you lose your arm in the war. Nelson: I'll get you after school, man! Does anyone else have an example of a paradox? Yeah, well, you know, kinda, um... but I was thinking I could go undercover. I don't bug you when you're helping Lisa. We're dissecting him next week. A terrible ghastly mistake. Nelson: Naw, happens all the time. The Carthaginians knew it. "The Simpsons" - set in the fictional town of Springfield - parodies American culture, society, television, and many aspects of the human condition, and is a satirical depiction of a middle class American lifestyle. The scene continues. Don’t mind if I do! Bart: I need some advice, Grampa. The key to Springfield has always been Elm Street. It's 216. Do you ever dream of leaving your class... to pursue your own intellectual development on an independent basis? Don't worry, Home boy. Jan 10: Share . We know our kid is nuts. I'll trade you the weight of a bowling ball... on the eighth moon of Jupiter from my lunch... for the weight of a feather on the second moon of Neptune from your lunch. A school without walls... where you do as much or as little of the assignments as you feel you need to. Milhouse Van Houten: Lunchtime, Bart! "Bart the Genius" is the second episode of The Simpsons' first season. Bart: Hey what’s the big idea?! Twenty-two points, plus triple-word-score, plus fifty points for using all my letters. Lisa: You'll never get one now, Mr. Name Caller! You're our hero, Bart! The preferred spelling of "wiener" is w-I-e-n-e-r... although "e-I" is an acceptable ethnic variant. ", Principal Skinner will be very interested to-- to--, Oh. Nelson: Ha-ha-ha! Because if you do, one day you may achieve something... that we Simpsons have dreamed about for generations. Bart: I ain't gonna get out of the 4th grade alive. The Simpsons Gets Political - SE01 E05 - Bart The General Script synopsis: After defending Lisa from school bully Nelson Muntz, Bart becomes Nelson's latest school bullying target.Sick of the harassment and torment, Bart, Grandpa Simpson, and Herman (a slightly deranged military antique store dealer with a missing arm) rally the town's children into fighting back against Nelson and his cronies. Peace, man. The scripts do contain written notes on them which I found to be pretty cool. Bart: I can't squeal, it would violate the code of the schoolyard. Herman: Not yet. I guess you were right, all that homework was a waste of time. Bye-bye Bart. Actually we came over because I want you to meet my grandson, Bart. Milhouse also picks up a Transformer toy. Nancy Jean Cartwright (born October 25, 1957) is an American actress, voice actress, painter, sculptor and philanthropist. Listen up, you may get a kick out of it. You're a dimwit. Homer: But what's a day off from work when I'm never gonna see my beloved son again! That’s my sister man! She is known for her long-running role as Bart Simpson on the animated television series The Simpsons.Cartwright also voices other characters for the show, including Nelson Muntz, Ralph Wiggum, Todd Flanders, Kearney, Database, and Maggie. You're right! Herman: And that's where we'll hit him. There are no good wars, with the following exceptions: The American Revolution, World War II and the Star Wars trilogy. Bart: All right! Why don't you eat something a little more nutritious? Bart: Well, if that's gonna be your attitude, then I'm not gonna untie you. Nelson: Lunch time! Bart the Genius: Original Script; Bart the General: Original Script; Moaning Lisa: Original Script; Some Enchanted: Original Script; Unaired Episode with Optional Commentary; Animatic: Bart the General w/Commentary, Albert Brooks; Outtakes; America's First Family BBC Special; Bart T-shirt Controversy ABC News; Tracy Ulman: Good Night Simpsons Never hurts to grease the wheels a little. Bart screams as he runs up some stairs, but it closely followed by Nelson. Homer: Yeah right, this ought to be good for a laugh! Bart the General Yellow Weasel: Nelson, y-you're bleeding. You see, when a child with Bart's intellect... is forced to slow down to the pace of a normal person... he's probably going to lash out in ways like these. I don't care what that stupid test says, Bart. The hook goes over the top and these things go in there. Bleech! ” Bart Simpson Bart Gets an `` F '' is the second episode of 2. You after school, he 's in all the same special classes I am.. marge:,. 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